Recent Sighting of the Great White Whale!

No shit...there I was dashing into the cafeteria of my son, Daniel's, Catholic school as the bell tolled. We got into the cafeteria on time, but after mandatory hugs and kisses were given I was trapped inside because assembly had started. Drat! But that's what you get when you're running late due to minor road flooding in beautiful Killeen (but we need the rain, so hey...but I digress)! Prayers begin and I'm standing next to my son at his table, another mother directly in front of me with her daughter bending over to pick up something of her little girl's and then the thing breached right there in front of me! WHALE TAIL, AHOY! Stunned, amazed, and in a state of disgust I tried to wipe the memory from my mind. No good! It was etched there and nothing but a good head bashing against the wall would do. Sadly, I feared that behaving thus may draw attention from the assembly so there I stood fixed, forgetting the "Angel of God" and instead praying for mental bleach to be applied by the Lord, but the prayers of this hapless woman went unanswered and the memory remained.

I stood there wondering what would make someone my age be so ridiculous. Surely I had imagined it all. I was mistaken completely! I mean she certainly appeared to be my age. If she was younger than I, she certainly wasn't standing the test of time, so again, WHY do something that young girls (hopefully with the appropriate body) do to show that they are ready to sleaze it on up? I'm not against thongs...if you want to wear a string up your ass and you can get past the constant wedgie feeling, more power to ya. Heaven knows it does get rid of ugly panty lines, but I protest the need to yank it up so high or wearing pants so low that the great white-trash whale rears it's ugly head.

As I pondered this (quite distracted now from the "Our Father") it breached again. This time even more pronounced...OH TURN AWAY AND DON'T LOOK! But like a train wreck (and still in a bit of disbelief that a woman in a Catholic elementary and preschool would be so tasteless), I could not avert my gaze...

I was WRONG! Hear it now for I do not say it often (and only when deserved!), but I was wrong! She was not wearing a thong, nor were her knickers in a twist! It was a tattoo! Not a tribal design...but a TATTOO OF A THONG!!!!!!

I know...I know...so much more to say, but alas, I must go and gouge my eyes out!